New Mama’s: It’s Not Just You
By Victoria Loughran
Registered Massage Therapist, Certified Infant Massage Instructor, Postpartum Doula | April 24, 2023
“It's me, hi, I'm the problem, it's me.”
The lyrics to that Taylor Swift song often makes me think of all the new moms out there, some of whom are suffering in silence with postpartum depression or anxiety. Feeling like they aren’t capable of being good mothers and that, somehow, it’s their own fault. It’s not. A major life change like bringing a whole new person into the world coupled with massive changes going on in your body can cause a little or a lot of mental and emotional fog in the early days.
I’m lucky to be a mom to three beautiful children whom I love and adore, but I will be the first to admit that the struggle is real. After the birth of my second child, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression and postpartum anxiety. Again, I feel so lucky that I was able to get the help I needed to realise I wasn’t failing. I just needed support.
That experience completely changed my worldview. It gifted me with so much compassion for every mother out there and this experience that we all share, yet is unique to each of us. (How is that even possible?) Beyond that, it changed the course of my career and gave me a new mission.
I’ve been accumulating information and techniques to help women before, during, and after their birth experience. I’ve sought certifications in infant massage, perinatal yoga, postpartum corrective, and postpartum doula. All this to say that I have so much love, empathy, and care for new moms, and I consider it a privilege to assist them in this wonderful and sometimes scary transition.
One lesson I learned the hard way is that we don’t have to do any of this alone. Humans weren’t meant to raise children in silo. We are creatures who crave connection, and there is a world full of women who have experienced similar challenges, who would love to hold a baby for you while you take a blessed shower, or who will bring you a cup of coffee and a donut after a rough night with a colicky infant. People generally step up when they’re needed (and they feel really good about it as an added bonus), so let them pick up your groceries or drop off a tray of baked ziti. And if you don’t have the support you need, seek it out.
One place to find that support is this gal right here (it’s me, hi!) Touch equals connection, and sometimes a professional therapeutic massage can work with your mind/body connection to make all the difference. As a postpartum doula, I can also come into your home to provide support on everything from sleep and feeding schedules to coping techniques for mom and dad’s frazzled nerves.
I am also so proud that here at Holistic Physiotherapy & Wellness, we have launched a brand-new model for a circle of care for mothers. The Mama + Cub Wellness Community is my passion project, because I know firsthand how important connection is – and how difficult it can be for some people to either make the time or find people in a similar stage of life.
That’s why the ‘cubs’ are welcome and we make this as ‘come as you are’ as possible. Join us in person or online for monthly gatherings. Each month, we’ll present a new topic with carefully vetted information from women’s health professionals. You’ll also have the opportunity to get to know other moms who are right there with you or who have been through it and want to share their hard-won wisdom.
Anyone who joins Mama + Cub will find the reassurance that it’s not you (hi!), you’re not failing, and yes, you were meant to do this. You just weren’t meant to do this alone.
Check out our Mama + Cub Wellness Community - or schedule a consultation with me and we’ll figure out the best way that I can support you in your journey. We’re all in the mamahood together!
Victoria Loughran
Registered Massage Therapist, Certified Infant Massage Instructor, Postpartum Doula